oh what a night
ah.... it's always nice to find the right buttons.
what else can i say?
i like it when things are centered from time to time.
and then, i like to make them a little bit different.
what a weekend.
friday i had a male patient offer to turn me straight.
sunday i had a male patient ask to feel me up.
monday and tuesday i had male patients ask for my phone number.
...it ain't happenin' folks.
maybe this isn't something straight women encounter.
i just don't get it.
i'm a homo.
sure, men are great. and i have no problem talking to a man.
hell, i'll even kiss you.
but when we hit that belt line, baby, there's a reason i lay back.
i don't do dick.
really.
and don't tell me about how all i need is one night in bed with you.
don't get me wrong:
better men have tried.
really.
but when it all falls apart and i'm the one lying in that hospital bed waiting for someone to come clean the poop that is spreading from under my red behind, i want the woman i've devoted my life to sitting next to me. her soft, deflated breasts that have held the heads and hands of the children we've raised together rising and falling gently with her breath as she holds my hand.
"just another minute, love, someone's coming."
and when it's me sitting in that chair in the ICU until my ass goes numb drinking horribly thick coffee that some kind and loving nurse assistant keeps bringing me while i'm waiting for my children to call i want them to say
"how's mom doing, mom?"
so thank you, honey, i don't want your number and you can't have mine.
i'm sure you're a good time in bed.
i'd call you out for beers if i trusted you weren't trying to get into my panties.
hell, i'd even let you into my panties if i trusted you weren't expecting me to get into yours.
if cock is so fantastic, you try it first.
that's right.
i said it.
if cock is so great
you
take
it
first.
i'll be here waiting for the details.
every last dripping,
sweating,
pusling,
gagging,
throbbing,
spurting,
toe-curling
last one of 'em.
do you get it, yet?
i don't ask my straight girl friends to go down on me.
what else can i say?
i told you, i'm gay.
Labels: gay, homo, lesbian, sexual harassment
posted by yorlor at 00:46
2 Comments:
I think it's funny that men think they can turn a woman who is gay straight by sleeping with her and all my guy gay friends never talk about how women offer to turn them straight by sleeping with them. BUT they do like boobs. My friends I mean. They think boobs are like "the best THINGS ever". Weirdos.
You remind me of my friend Skylar. She's sassy like you.
I hope you have the chance to say "if cock is so fantastic, you try it first" at some point. That is a wonderful line. I don't know if straight women get the same level of hitting on, but my guess would be yes. Obviously, they're not getting conversion offers, but I bet they're getting the "hey, can I feel you up?" offers, at least. What can I say? Men are pigs.
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