"people with short haircuts have attitudes"
i wish i was kidding. i JUST had a patient say this to me.
frustrating.
for both of us.
the scenario: i get a call at 11 this morning after making my way down to the university where i am pleading my case to have them allow me to complete my BSN. it's my floor CNC: we need you tonight. badly.
i had signed on for a 3-11 on wednesday after having the 3 year old from 8-2:30. we reviewed this. "we can tank that shift and figure it out later. i need you tonight. the nurses will KILL me if i don't have an NA tonight." this means i'll have the 3 year old after being up all night with a floor full of patients, some of whom need more attention than 3 nurses and an NA can give them. Case in point: the patient for whom this post is named.
i've been in her room a dozen times cleaning the CoLytely poop from her room mate who is bleeding like gang busters from her back end. i've been keeping the oxygen on a 450 pound patient who likes to be naked all of the time [lovely, really], who also likes having screaming matches with people in his sleep. we've had four admits since 11 pm, all of whom needed vitals twice plus the other four who needed them twice. we're a full house. 19 patients. i made three trips down stairs to get equipment and chucks because we couldn't wait for someone to bring them to us.
now, don't get me wrong. i love to help people, and i enjoyed the ten minute chat i had with the guy who's been here too long and has too much going at home to be happy about much of anything, but this particular patient doesn't say "please" and isn't nice. she isn't in any ridiculous pain, didn't have surgery and doesn't need help getting in and out of bed to pee like the three women next door to her. she bitched and moaned for hours about wanting a sandwich when i got on and scoffed at the graham crackers and peanut butter i was able to grab her between vitals and falling blood pressures. "i don't drink milk." "then don't drink it." "i won't."
she asked for water as i was leaving after the last bloody watery stool change. i handed her the water from her tray. "that water is warm." "it'll be a minute." "it always is."
i was getting her fresh ice water just then. just to prove the point that i wasn't trying to be mean to her. she hit her call button.
"did you hit your button?" "water." "i have it here for you." i wanted to throw it at her. "you said it would be a minute." "it happens, ma'am. i'm sorry." "i bet you are."
i couldn't get out of it. i'm exhausted. i was pissed. didn't she understand i was supposed to be sleeping so that i could bust my ass TOMORROW? didn't she understand i was bending over backwards to maintain the dignity of patients who needed help wiping their asses, cleaning the shit out of the beds they were lying in and couldn't walk to the bathroom without someone helping them out of the bed!!!???!!!
no. she couldn't.
my reply to her comment: "people with short hair have attitudes with people who don't say please and thank you." "i don't have to be polite. it's not my job. people with short hair cuts have attitudes." "what are you implying, ma'am?" i don't recall her response. "are you implying something about my hair cut or my life style?" the charge nurse came in and asked me for some totally benign information she could have gotten from a chart.
i should apologize. but how?
BK is doing. i went to see her tonight before checking into the floor. she started her 3rd round of chemo yesterday. she was assembling a collage and drinking a beer. she is skinny as hell and braver than anyone i know. she practically falls under the weight of her own bones. she was talking about the new chemo "i was doing some reading and it said this drug is shown to increase life expectancy five months. 5 months!? i'm doing all of this for Five Months?! what am i doing this for?" then she talked about Matisse. about how he created until the day he died. about how he adapted from painting to cutting paper when eh couldn't stand to paint anymore. she said the chemo nurses were different to her this time. that they were colder. she fears that they aren't as friendly because they know she's going to die and they don't want to get close to her.
i pray she never feels that way about me.
frustrating.
for both of us.
the scenario: i get a call at 11 this morning after making my way down to the university where i am pleading my case to have them allow me to complete my BSN. it's my floor CNC: we need you tonight. badly.
i had signed on for a 3-11 on wednesday after having the 3 year old from 8-2:30. we reviewed this. "we can tank that shift and figure it out later. i need you tonight. the nurses will KILL me if i don't have an NA tonight." this means i'll have the 3 year old after being up all night with a floor full of patients, some of whom need more attention than 3 nurses and an NA can give them. Case in point: the patient for whom this post is named.
i've been in her room a dozen times cleaning the CoLytely poop from her room mate who is bleeding like gang busters from her back end. i've been keeping the oxygen on a 450 pound patient who likes to be naked all of the time [lovely, really], who also likes having screaming matches with people in his sleep. we've had four admits since 11 pm, all of whom needed vitals twice plus the other four who needed them twice. we're a full house. 19 patients. i made three trips down stairs to get equipment and chucks because we couldn't wait for someone to bring them to us.
now, don't get me wrong. i love to help people, and i enjoyed the ten minute chat i had with the guy who's been here too long and has too much going at home to be happy about much of anything, but this particular patient doesn't say "please" and isn't nice. she isn't in any ridiculous pain, didn't have surgery and doesn't need help getting in and out of bed to pee like the three women next door to her. she bitched and moaned for hours about wanting a sandwich when i got on and scoffed at the graham crackers and peanut butter i was able to grab her between vitals and falling blood pressures. "i don't drink milk." "then don't drink it." "i won't."
she asked for water as i was leaving after the last bloody watery stool change. i handed her the water from her tray. "that water is warm." "it'll be a minute." "it always is."
i was getting her fresh ice water just then. just to prove the point that i wasn't trying to be mean to her. she hit her call button.
"did you hit your button?" "water." "i have it here for you." i wanted to throw it at her. "you said it would be a minute." "it happens, ma'am. i'm sorry." "i bet you are."
i couldn't get out of it. i'm exhausted. i was pissed. didn't she understand i was supposed to be sleeping so that i could bust my ass TOMORROW? didn't she understand i was bending over backwards to maintain the dignity of patients who needed help wiping their asses, cleaning the shit out of the beds they were lying in and couldn't walk to the bathroom without someone helping them out of the bed!!!???!!!
no. she couldn't.
my reply to her comment: "people with short hair have attitudes with people who don't say please and thank you." "i don't have to be polite. it's not my job. people with short hair cuts have attitudes." "what are you implying, ma'am?" i don't recall her response. "are you implying something about my hair cut or my life style?" the charge nurse came in and asked me for some totally benign information she could have gotten from a chart.
i should apologize. but how?
BK is doing. i went to see her tonight before checking into the floor. she started her 3rd round of chemo yesterday. she was assembling a collage and drinking a beer. she is skinny as hell and braver than anyone i know. she practically falls under the weight of her own bones. she was talking about the new chemo "i was doing some reading and it said this drug is shown to increase life expectancy five months. 5 months!? i'm doing all of this for Five Months?! what am i doing this for?" then she talked about Matisse. about how he created until the day he died. about how he adapted from painting to cutting paper when eh couldn't stand to paint anymore. she said the chemo nurses were different to her this time. that they were colder. she fears that they aren't as friendly because they know she's going to die and they don't want to get close to her.
i pray she never feels that way about me.
posted by yorlor at 05:00
1 Comments:
I'm sure in the dark hours of the night when that lady who was quite rude to you sits alone in her room she is thankful for the fresh cold water that you brought her. I'm sure she just is angry at the world for some unknown reason. It's not right she was disrespectful to you though. I give you girls credit-I don't have the patience to deal with rude people all the time. I snap back. It's ugly at times. I wish it weren't.
I'm glad to hear about BK some more. I was just wondering the other day when I came here to read what happened with her. I'm sure those nurses are afraid to get close to her. It would suck to have a relationship with someone and then they die. Again, doesn't make any of it right.
Sickness is a horrible thing we face everyday. Some do it with more dignity than others obviously. To live for 5 more months and go through all that would seem senseless I guess. But if you asked me would I rather go tomorrow or be here for 5 more months? I'd take my medicine and pray for 6 just to be around those I loved a little while longer. You're lucky to have each other.
I do have a question though Yorlor, explain watching the "3 YEAR OLD" to me. Whose 3 year old is this? Yours?
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